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Writing Academic Task 2 Band 9.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

365 words AcademicTask 2
Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

  • A fuel-price rise may discourage optional car journeys, but it can affect people with limited transport choices more heavily.
  • Frequent, affordable and reliable public transport gives commuters a practical alternative to driving.
  • Combine congestion measures, such as peak-time charges, with investments in cleaner vehicles and safe walking or cycling routes.

Suggested structure

  1. Introduce the problem and state clearly whether higher petrol prices are the best solution.
  2. Explain one benefit and one limitation of increasing fuel prices.
  3. Develop public transport as a main alternative, linking service improvements to reduced car use.
  4. Add one or two complementary measures for congestion and pollution.
  5. Conclude by comparing a price increase alone with a combined approach.
Useful vocabulary & examples
a practical alternative to driving
A realistic option that people can use instead of travelling by car.

Frequent buses would give commuters a practical alternative to driving.

peak-time charges
Fees applied to vehicles travelling in busy areas during the most congested hours.

Peak-time charges could reduce the number of cars entering the city centre.

emissions standards
Official limits on the pollutants that vehicles or other sources may release.

Stricter emissions standards can help reduce pollution from vehicles.

place a heavier burden on
To make a cost or difficulty affect a particular group more severely.

A large fuel-price increase could place a heavier burden on lower-income drivers.

Task Prompt

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 9.0

Raising the price of petrol is frequently proposed as a strategy to alleviate the escalating issues of traffic congestion and environmental pollution. While this approach has potential merits, it also presents certain drawbacks. On the positive side, increased fuel costs may dissuade individuals from engaging in unnecessary car travel, thereby leading to diminished traffic volume where alternatives are available.

A higher fuel price can give drivers a reason to reconsider optional journeys. Someone who can walk to a nearby shop may choose to do so when the cost of driving rises. However, the effect depends on whether the journey can be changed. A worker who has no reliable bus service may still need a car, so the policy can increase their expenses without reducing the number of vehicles on the road.

There is also a fairness issue. People on limited incomes may find the extra cost difficult to absorb, while wealthier drivers may continue making the same journeys. A uniform price change does not distinguish an unnecessary trip from a necessary one. Nor does it directly improve an unreliable transport service. This makes it an incomplete response even if it influences some decisions at the margin.

A more useful measure is to make shared transport a realistic choice. Reliable schedules, suitable routes and straightforward connections can reduce the practical disadvantages of taking a bus or train. Safe walking and cycling routes can help for shorter trips. The objective is not simply to tell people to drive less, but to provide a feasible way to reach the places they need to go.

Targeted measures can also address crowded locations and particular sources of pollution. Managing parking, coordinating deliveries and controlling access where congestion is severe may be more precise than changing the cost of every litre of fuel. Cleaner vehicles can address some emissions, but do not by themselves remove the space occupied by traffic. The two problems should therefore be considered together without assuming they are identical.

In conclusion, petrol prices can play a supporting role, but I would prioritise practical alternatives and measures directed at the actual problem. A price increase is least convincing where people have little ability to change how they travel.

Targeted Improvement Tips

1
Use the direct opening to answer the precise task and keep that judgement consistent.
2
Develop a relevant example through cause and consequence rather than leaving it as a name or list item.
3
Check the quoted clauses in context and qualify statements that imply a guaranteed outcome.

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