User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 2 Band 4.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

283 words AcademicTask 2

Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Zoos may support conservation through breeding programmes and care for animals that cannot safely return to the wild.
Captivity can limit animals’ movement and natural behaviour, while noise and visitor contact may cause stress.
A balanced position can distinguish entertainment-focused zoos from rescue centres or carefully managed conservation programmes.

Suggested structure

Introduce the disagreement and state your own position clearly.
Explain the strongest argument for zoos, using conservation or education as a reason.
Explain the opposing welfare argument and its consequences for animals.
Give your judgement, clarify any exception you accept, and conclude with a practical alternative.

Useful vocabulary & examples

breeding programme: An organised effort to help animals reproduce, often to support a threatened population.
A carefully managed breeding programme may help maintain the population of an endangered species.
animal welfare: The health, comfort and quality of life of animals.
Animal welfare should be central to any decision about keeping wild animals in captivity.
natural habitat: The place and environment where an animal normally lives in the wild.
Protecting a natural habitat can allow wild animals to live and reproduce with greater freedom.
return to the wild: To release an animal back into its natural environment when it can survive there.
Some rescued animals may be able to return to the wild after treatment.

Task Prompt

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

There is a heated debate over whether zoos are cruel and should be shut down. I believe that these places are indeed beneficial for preserving wild animals. On the one hand, zoos can be deprived of their freedom which makes people steadfastly cling to the opinion of closing the zoos. The majority of Zoological will say that animals need space to run and live in a natural way. In zoo, they are kept in small cages and cannot choose where to go. They may feel stress and become unhappy. Also, some zoos focus on making money from visitors, and the animals are not always treated well. For these reasons, some people think all zoos should close.

On the other hand, zoos can help animals that are in danger. Many species lose their homes because of hunting and human development. A zoo can give them food and medical care, and workers can help them have babies. In some cases, young animals can later be released, although this is not possible for every species. This is a practical way to help some wildlife survive. Visitors can also learn about animals and why they need protection. They can see these animals closely, which makes the problem easier to understand. This knowledge may encourage people to support wildlife.

In my opinion, zoos should not all be closed. However, they must provide large and suitable places, and should not keep animals only for entertainment. The government should check zoos regularly and close those that treat animals badly. If zoos protect endangered animals and prepare them to return to the wild, they can be useful. Therefore, I believe good zoos are important, but bad ones should be shut down.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Rewrite the opening anti-zoo point so the animals, rather than the zoos, are clearly identified as the ones whose freedom is restricted.

Develop each main view with a specific cause-and-effect explanation—for example, how habitat loss makes conservation work valuable, or how limited space affects animal welfare.

Before submitting, check noun forms and articles in phrases such as “in zoos,” and read each sentence to confirm that its subject performs the intended action.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

283

Type

Task 2

Criteria Breakdown

Task Response

5.0 Band

The response addresses both views and gives a clear position: “I believe that these places are indeed beneficial” and later “zoos should not all be closed.” It offers relevant reasons about animal welfare, habitat loss, care and public learning. However, some points remain general, and the opening explanation of the anti-zoo view is unclear. Next, develop each side with a more precise explanation of how the example supports your argument.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.0 Band

The answer follows a recognisable progression, using “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In my opinion” to guide the reader through the discussion. The final paragraph also returns to the writer’s position. However, ideas within paragraphs are sometimes connected loosely, and “The majority of Zoological will say” interrupts the flow because its wording is unclear. Next, use a clear topic sentence for each paragraph and link each reason to its consequence.

Lexical Resource

4.5 Band

The response includes relevant topic language such as “medical care,” “endangered animals,” and “return to the wild.” Some choices are imprecise or unnatural, including “steadfastly cling to the opinion” and “large and suitable places”; “In zoo” is also an incorrect form. The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main points, but collocations need more control. Next, learn topic phrases in complete example sentences and check whether each phrase fits its context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.0 Band

Simple clauses usually communicate the intended meaning, as in “Many species lose their homes because of hunting and human development.” However, there are clear errors in “zoos can be deprived of their freedom,” where the animals—not the zoos—are deprived, and “The majority of Zoological will,” which has an incomplete noun phrase. Missing or awkward sentence punctuation also affects clarity. Next, check subject–verb meaning, articles, plural forms and sentence boundaries during editing.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.02 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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