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Writing Academic Task 1 Band 4.0 Example

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203 words AcademicTask 1Line Graph

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Identify the overall direction of each line separately: margarine and butter fall over the full period, while the low-fat variety rises after it appears and then declines.
Highlight key turning points: butter peaks in 1986, margarine reaches a plateau around 100 grams in 1991–1996, and the low-fat line surges by 2001.
Mention crossovers where they change the ranking: Low Fat & Reduced Spreads is highest in 2001, while butter and margarine are no longer the leading series.

Suggested structure

Introduce the graph, naming all three spreads, the years and the unit.
Give an overview that accurately summarises the different overall patterns and the late-period ranking.
Describe butter and margarine together, using their start values, peaks or plateaus and final values.
Describe the later-starting low-fat series and compare its 2001 peak with the other spreads.

Useful vocabulary & examples

reached a peak of: rose to its highest recorded value
Butter reached a peak of approximately 160 grams in 1986.
remained stable at: stayed at approximately the same level
Margarine consumption remained stable at around 100 grams from 1991 to 1996.
overtook both alternatives: became higher than the other two series
Low Fat & Reduced Spreads overtook both alternatives in 2001.
eased to: fell slightly or gradually to a lower value
The low-fat spread eased to about 70 grams by 2007.

Task Prompt

The graph below shows the consumption of 3 spreads from 1981 to 2007.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

The line graph illustrates information about the consumption of spreads between 1981 and 2007 Overall, the was a huge decline of butter consumtion, from 1986 to 2007, lowfat and reeuced spreads showed a little change between 1996 and 2007. the consumption of margrine declined through years. Firstly, in 1981 the consumption of butter showed about 140 grams. It then increased to approximately 160 grams in 1986, before falling to 100 grams in 1991. After this, butter continued to go down, reaching about 70 grams in 1996 and around 50 grams at the end of the period. In comparison, margarine started at 90 grams and decreased slightly to 80 in 1986. It rose again to 100 grams in 1991, and stayed at this level until 1996. After 1996, it went down, first to about 85 in 2001 and then 40 grams in 2007. The lowfat and reduced spread was not shown before 1996, when it was only 10 grams. It then rose very quickly to about 85 grams in 2001, becoming higher than the other spreads. In 2007, it decreased to 70 grams, while butter and margarine were lower. More specifically, the red line changed considerably overall, despite the earlier description of little change.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Write an overview that accurately contrasts the overall fall in butter with the sharp rise and later decline in the low-fat spread.

Organise the body by comparing the two spreads available from 1981, then describe the low-fat spread’s introduction and subsequent change.

Proofread the chart’s key nouns and sentence boundaries: check “consumption,” “margarine,” “reduced,” capital letters, and full stops.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

203

Type

Line Graph

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

4.0 Band

The answer includes the main trends and several relevant figures, such as butter reaching “approximately 160 grams in 1986” and the new spread rising to “about 85 grams in 2001.” However, the overview incorrectly says the low-fat spread showed little change, although it rose sharply, and the opening butter figure is not stated until later. Give a clear, accurate overview first, then select the main figures to support it.

Coherence & Cohesion

4.0 Band

The answer follows a broadly understandable timeline, moving from butter to margarine and then the low-fat spread, and uses transitions such as “In comparison” and “After 1996.” However, missing sentence punctuation after “2007” and the shift from “Firstly” to a series of unsignposted details weaken the flow. The final sentence also conflicts with the overview. Separate the introduction and overview, group comparisons, and check that the summary matches the details.

Lexical Resource

4.0 Band

There is some useful chart vocabulary, including “falling,” “decreased slightly,” and “rose very quickly,” which communicates direction. Several misspellings—“consumtion,” “reeuced,” and “margrine”—make key terms harder to read, and “went down” is repeated in place of more precise trend language. Learn and proofread the chart terms “consumption,” “reduced,” and “margarine,” then vary trend verbs where appropriate.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

3.5 Band

The continuation uses some clear comparative and time clauses, as in “before falling to 100 grams in 1991,” but the opening contains major sentence and word-form problems: “Overall, the was a huge decline” lacks a grammatical subject, and the sentence beginning “the consumption” is not capitalised. “The lowfat and reduced spread was” also has awkward number agreement. Practise complete overview sentences and proofread capitals, articles, and singular/plural agreement.

Topic Band Distribution

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Writing Academic Task 1 Band 4.0 Example

Plan your answer

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