User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 2 Band 5.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

272 words AcademicTask 2

Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Skills-based assistance, such as teacher training or vocational education, can build local capacity beyond the duration of a grant.
Health, water and agricultural partnerships can target essential services and practical needs, especially when local communities help set priorities.
Financial support can remain valuable during emergencies and infrastructure projects when it is transparent, accountable and coordinated with other forms of assistance.

Suggested structure

Introduce the issue and state a qualified position on whether non-financial assistance should be prioritised.
Explain how practical or technical support can address underlying causes of poverty, using specific examples.
Acknowledge why financial aid is still needed, such as emergencies or infrastructure.
Conclude by presenting a balanced approach and linking it to sustainable poverty reduction.

Useful vocabulary & examples

locally led support: assistance planned or guided by the people and institutions it is intended to help
Locally led support is more likely to reflect a community's priorities.
technical expertise: specialised knowledge or practical skills in a particular area
Sharing technical expertise can help strengthen public health services.
transparent and accountable funding: financial assistance whose use is open to scrutiny and for which responsible parties can be held answerable
Transparent and accountable funding can reduce the risk of aid being poorly targeted.
underlying causes of poverty: deeper conditions that contribute to poverty, rather than its immediate symptoms
Vocational education may address some underlying causes of poverty by expanding access to skills.

Task Prompt

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

User Essay Analysis

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Band 5.0

There are many unsolved problems in the world which people have to face during their lives. Some developed countries donate a great deal to needy ones, however it is not a solution for this issue. So, they ought to help them by other ways rather than finance. I agree with this statement because of some reasons. First, giving money does not always reach the people who need it most. Sometimes it is controlled by local governments or organisations, and some of it may be spent badly. As a result, poor families may not get any real benefit. If developed countries give practical help, it can be easier to see what has been provided and how it is used. Second, education and job training can help people to support themselves in the future. For example, experts can teach farmers how to grow food more successfully, or help young people learn skills for employment. This kind of support may take time, but it can make communities less dependent on aid. Developed countries can also help to improve schools, hospitals and clean water systems, so that people have better services in their daily lives. However, money is still important in some situations. After a natural disaster, for instance, people may need immediate financial support to buy food and medicine. Therefore, rich countries should not stop giving money completely. They should use it carefully and combine it with long-term practical help. In conclusion, I agree that developed countries should provide other kinds of assistance instead of relying only on financial aid. Training, education and better services can help poorer countries solve problems for a longer time.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Replace the broad opening about “unsolved problems” with a sentence that directly frames the issue as persistent poverty and the limits of financial aid.

For each proposed form of assistance, explain one clear outcome—for example, how training can improve employment or how better water systems can support daily life.

Edit the final draft for clause boundaries and collocations: check comma-plus-“however” constructions, “in other ways,” and the phrase “financial aid.”

AI Feedback

Overall Band

5.0

Modest

Words

272

Type

Task 2

Criteria Breakdown

Task Response

5.5 Band

The position is clear in “I agree with this statement,” and the completed response gives relevant reasons: aid may not reach families, while training and services can support long-term improvement. It also recognises that money can help after disasters, which adds balance. The opening refers broadly to “unsolved problems,” though, rather than defining poverty directly. Make the connection between each example and reducing poverty explicit.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.5 Band

The answer develops a readable sequence from the concern about financial aid to practical alternatives, then qualifies the position with “However, money is still important.” “First,” “Second,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages. Some links are more additive than explanatory, and “this issue” has a vague reference. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main claim, then explain the cause-and-effect link to poverty.

Lexical Resource

5.0 Band

The response uses relevant topic vocabulary such as “job training,” “local governments,” “financial support,” and “clean water systems.” These terms make the proposed alternatives understandable. However, the opening’s “needy ones” and “rather than finance” sound imprecise, and “some reasons” is vague. Choose consistent terms such as “poorer countries” and “financial aid,” and specify the particular reason before giving an example.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.5 Band

Most of the completed response uses straightforward sentence patterns, including the conditional “If developed countries give practical help, it can be easier to see…” The visible opening contains a comma splice in “needy ones, however” and an awkward construction in “by other ways rather than finance.” These reduce control even though the meaning remains clear. Practise separating linked independent clauses and checking prepositions and noun forms during editing.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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