User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 2 Band 4.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

268 words AcademicTask 2

Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Skills-based assistance, such as teacher training or vocational education, can build local capacity beyond the duration of a grant.
Health, water and agricultural partnerships can target essential services and practical needs, especially when local communities help set priorities.
Financial support can remain valuable during emergencies and infrastructure projects when it is transparent, accountable and coordinated with other forms of assistance.

Suggested structure

Introduce the issue and state a qualified position on whether non-financial assistance should be prioritised.
Explain how practical or technical support can address underlying causes of poverty, using specific examples.
Acknowledge why financial aid is still needed, such as emergencies or infrastructure.
Conclude by presenting a balanced approach and linking it to sustainable poverty reduction.

Useful vocabulary & examples

locally led support: assistance planned or guided by the people and institutions it is intended to help
Locally led support is more likely to reflect a community's priorities.
technical expertise: specialised knowledge or practical skills in a particular area
Sharing technical expertise can help strengthen public health services.
transparent and accountable funding: financial assistance whose use is open to scrutiny and for which responsible parties can be held answerable
Transparent and accountable funding can reduce the risk of aid being poorly targeted.
underlying causes of poverty: deeper conditions that contribute to poverty, rather than its immediate symptoms
Vocational education may address some underlying causes of poverty by expanding access to skills.

Task Prompt

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

Nowadays, many people think that poverty line of the poor nations is not reduced , although wealthy nations gives their money to the country where economical condition is not good ,so majority of masses think that it is better to provide other types of services rather than giving money .I believe that it is best to give them practical help, because this can improve people's lives for a long time. For example, rich countries can build schools and hospitals in poor countries. If children can go to school, they may get a better job in the future and support their family. Also, hospitals can help people who are sick and cannot pay for treatment. These things are important for the society and they can reduce poverty in the future.

Another kind of help is teaching people useful skills. Rich countries can send teachers and experts to help local people learn farming or other work. Then people can earn money by themselves and they do not need to wait for donations. Money can sometimes be used in a wrong way by governments, so giving services directly may be more useful. However, I do not think that all financial aid should stop. When there is a war, flood or other emergency, money is needed quickly to buy food and medicine. Therefore, financial aid still have a place in some situations.

In conclusion, I agree that developed countries should give more practical support, such as education, health care and training, because it can help poor people for a long time. But financial help is also necessary when people face a serious emergency.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Rewrite the opening as two sentences: state that poverty persists despite aid, then give your position on practical support.

Develop one example in each body paragraph by explaining the aid, who benefits from it, and how it could improve long-term income or wellbeing.

After drafting, underline every verb and check that it agrees with its subject; also check sentence boundaries and the use of “a,” “the” and no article.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

268

Type

Task 2

Criteria Breakdown

Task Response

5.0 Band

The position is clear in “I believe that it is best to give them practical help,” and the response addresses alternatives such as schools, hospitals and skills training. It also makes a relevant qualification by saying financial aid is needed in emergencies. However, the ideas are mostly asserted rather than explained in depth, and the opening claim about money not reducing poverty is not supported with a clear reason. Develop one example further to show how a specific form of help reduces poverty.

Coherence & Cohesion

4.5 Band

The essay follows a recognisable path from the main view to examples, a qualification and a conclusion. Connectors such as “For example,” “Also” and “However” help signal the relationships between ideas. But the first sentence is difficult to follow because several points are joined together, and the body paragraphs contain several examples without a clear hierarchy. Separate the opening into shorter sentences and give each body paragraph one controlling idea.

Lexical Resource

4.5 Band

The response uses relevant topic vocabulary, including “hospitals,” “treatment,” “useful skills” and “financial aid,” so the reader can follow the general argument. Some expressions are inaccurate or awkward, notably “poverty line of the poor nations” and “economical condition,” while “help” and “poor countries” recur frequently. Build precision by learning common combinations such as “reduce poverty,” “economic conditions” and “provide vocational training,” then use them where they fit.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.0 Band

There are some clear simple sentences, such as “These things are important for the society,” and the response attempts longer clauses with “because” and “although.” Frequent errors nevertheless affect accuracy: “wealthy nations gives” has subject–verb disagreement, and “financial aid still have a place” has the same problem. The opening also has faulty spacing and sentence boundaries. Practise checking each sentence for its subject, verb and full stop, then proofread agreement and articles.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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