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User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 2 Band 9.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

281 words AcademicTask 2
Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

Plan your answer

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Ideas to explore

  • Explain how engaging content, autoplay and mobile games can make children lose track of time.
  • Discuss how family device habits and the convenience of phones may normalise frequent use.
  • Weigh potential benefits such as learning and communication against effects on sleep, physical activity and concentration.

Suggested structure

  1. Introduce the issue and give a clear view on whether the trend is positive or negative.
  2. Use the first body paragraph to explain key causes, supported by specific examples.
  3. Use the second body paragraph to evaluate consequences and acknowledge any genuine benefits.
  4. Conclude by restating the judgement and giving a practical response, such as setting reasonable limits.
Useful vocabulary & examples
immediate entertainment
Enjoyment that is available quickly and with little effort.

Games and short videos provide immediate entertainment for children.

stay connected with friends
Maintain communication and contact with other people.

Messaging apps help children stay connected with friends outside school.

face-to-face interaction
Communication between people who are physically together.

Heavy phone use may leave less time for face-to-face interaction.

set clear screen-time boundaries
Establish understandable limits on how long devices can be used.

Parents can set clear screen-time boundaries, especially before bedtime.

Task Prompt

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Is it a positive or negative trend?

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 9.0

The ubiquitous presence of smartphones has profoundly impacted our lives, and children are no exception. Many children dedicate a significant portion of their day to these devices, raising concerns about the reasons behind this trend and its potential consequences. Several factors contribute to children’s fascination with smartphones. The devices offer a captivating array of interactive games, videos and educational applications that provide instant entertainment and keep users engaged. In addition, smartphones are portable and readily available; when adults are busy, a device can occupy a child with little effort. Social influence also matters: children may want to join conversations and games their peers share online.

There are some advantages to this trend. Carefully selected apps can help children practise skills, explore topics that interest them and communicate with relatives who live far away. Smartphones can also be useful for parents who need to contact their children. However, these benefits depend on the content children access and the amount of time they spend using the devices.

On balance, I believe that spending hours on a smartphone every day is a negative trend. Excessive screen use can displace sleep, physical activity, reading and face-to-face interaction. It may also make it harder for children to concentrate on less stimulating activities, particularly when notifications and short videos repeatedly compete for their attention. The concern is not that smartphones are inherently harmful, but that unrestricted use can crowd out important parts of childhood.

Parents and schools can respond by setting reasonable screen-time limits, encouraging offline hobbies and choosing age-appropriate content. In short, children are drawn to smartphones because they are entertaining, accessible and socially important, but prolonged daily use is negative unless adults provide clear boundaries.

Targeted Improvement Tips

1
Make the final judgement even more nuanced by distinguishing supervised learning or communication from hours of unrestricted entertainment.
2
For each cause, connect it to a specific consequence: for example, explain how repeated notifications may interrupt concentration.
3
Keep the opening focused on the question by moving quickly from the general context to the reasons children use smartphones.

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