User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 4.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

182 words AcademicTask 1Pie Chart

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Compare the leading reason across both years: suitable degree courses ranked first, rising slightly from 35% to 37%.
Highlight the largest increase: choosing a university close to the parental home went from 10% to 22%.
Contrast the sharpest decline with the smaller fall: sports and social activities dropped from 19% to 6%, while quality of resources moved from 21% to 17%.

Suggested structure

Paraphrase the chart topic and identify both years.
Give an overview of the top reason and the most notable increases and decreases.
Describe the 1987 figures, grouping the largest and smallest categories.
Compare the 2007 figures with 1987, using exact percentages and clear change language.

Useful vocabulary & examples

accounted for: made up a particular percentage or share
Suitable degree courses accounted for 35% of responses in 1987.
rose slightly: increased by a small amount
The share choosing suitable degree courses rose slightly to 37%.
increased considerably: grew by a noticeable amount
The proportion choosing a university close to home increased considerably, from 10% to 22%.
fell substantially: decreased by a large amount
Good sports and social activities fell substantially, from 19% to 6%.

Task Prompt

The charts below show the main reasons why students chose a particular university in the UK, in 1997 and 2007.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

The pie charts compare the percentage of main reasons why American students chose a particular university between 1997 and 2007 Overall, the proportion of students chose university because the suitable degree courses accounted for the highest in both years while the number for proximity to parental home is lowest. Between 1997 and 2007 the proportion of students choosing the other factors also changed. The chart itself labels the first year as 1987, although the question states 1997, so the figures below follow the printed chart label. In 1987, suitable degree courses made up 35%, compared with 37% in 2007, and remained the main reason. Quality of resources fell from 21% to 17%, while good sports and social activities dropped from 19% to 6%. In contrast, the share choosing closeness to the parental home rose from 10% to 22%, making it the second most popular reason in 2007. Quality of teaching increased slightly, from 15% to 18%. Overall, degree-course suitability was the leading factor in both years. Sports and social activities recorded the sharpest decline, whereas proximity to home showed the biggest rise.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Open by noting that the task wording says 1997 but the first chart label reads 1987; use the year printed on the chart when reporting its values.

Replace “American students” with “students,” and describe the figures as percentages or shares rather than numbers.

After a one-sentence overview, compare the categories with the clearest changes: the rise in proximity to home (10% to 22%) and the fall in sports and social activities (19% to 6%).

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

182

Type

Pie Chart

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

5.5 Band

The completed response covers all five chart categories and gives the main values, including the rise in “proximity to the parental home” from 10% to 22%. It also correctly notes that the first chart is labelled 1987, unlike the task wording. However, “American students” is unsupported, and the opening repeats the task’s 1997 date as if it matched the chart. Next, describe the population as students and flag the date discrepancy before presenting comparisons.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.0 Band

The answer has a recognisable overview and then moves through the categories, with “In contrast” helping distinguish increases from decreases. The phrase “Between 1997 and 2007” followed by a correction about the chart label creates avoidable confusion, and the overview is difficult to follow because its sentences are not cleanly separated. Start with a short note about the date discrepancy, then group falling figures and rising figures before a concise overall summary.

Lexical Resource

4.5 Band

Some task-relevant wording is effective, including “remained the main reason,” “dropped,” and “increased slightly.” However, “the percentage of main reasons” and “the number for proximity” are imprecise descriptions of proportions, while “because the suitable degree courses” is an awkward phrase. Use consistent chart language such as “the share of students citing” a reason, and avoid adding “American” when the chart does not identify students’ nationality.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.0 Band

Several sentences communicate comparisons, but recurring errors weaken control. In “the proportion of students chose,” the relative clause needs “who chose”; “because the suitable degree courses” needs restructuring; and “between 1997 and 2007 Overall” lacks sentence punctuation. The completed portion is clearer, but the preserved opening still limits accuracy. Proofread for relative clauses, articles, and sentence boundaries, then check that past-tense reporting stays consistent.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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