User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 5.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

209 words AcademicTask 1Map

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Trace how the western side changed from houses and farmland to a car park and sports field, then to an expanded car park and smaller sports field.
Note that the science block appears by 1980, while the main school building stays in the northeastern area.
Identify features that remain broadly stable across the maps, including the main road along the northern boundary and the playground in the southeast.

Suggested structure

Introduce the dates and identify the maps as changes to the school site.
Give an overview of the main redevelopment and the features that remain.
Describe the 1950 layout using clear directional references.
Compare the main additions and replacements in 1980 and 2010.
End with the most notable change, such as the car park’s expansion and the sports field’s reduction.

Useful vocabulary & examples

occupy the western side: be located across the western part of a site
By 2010, the car park occupied most of the western side.
be replaced by: be removed and have something else put in its place
The houses and farmland were replaced by facilities for parking and sport.
expand southwards: increase in size toward the south
The car park expanded southwards between 1980 and 2010.
remain in the northeastern area: stay broadly in the northeast part of a location
The main school building remained in the northeastern area of the site.

Task Prompt

The diagram below show the changes that have taken place at West park secondary school since its construction in 1950. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and make comparisons while relevant.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 5.0

This picture illustrates the different alternations that happened to the West park Secondary School between 1950 and 2010. Overall, by 1980, the farmland has been completely altered to a sports field which by 2010 has become much smaller in size because of the construction project of a car park which aimed to extend it even further. In 1950, the site was divided into four main areas. Houses stood in the north-west, beside the main road, while the school was in the north-east. Farmland occupied the south-west, and a playground was located in the south-east.

By 1980, the houses and farmland had disappeared. A car park took up part of the north-west, and a science block was added between it and the main school building. The sports field replaced the farmland, while the playground remained in the south-east. In 2010, the car park had expanded considerably, covering most of the western side and extending into the southern area. The science block and main school building remained in the northern part, although the field was reduced and shifted to a narrow area near the centre. The playground continued to occupy the south-east. Overall, the school changed from a site with housing and farmland into one with more parking and school facilities.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Write an overview that states the two largest changes: the car park expanded, while the sports field became smaller; also note that the playground remained in the south-east.

Use past-tense comparison language consistently, for example, “The houses were replaced by a car park and science block.”

Describe only what the maps show: replace claims about the car park’s purpose with its location and increased area.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

5.0

Modest

Words

209

Type

Map

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

5.5 Band

The response identifies the main development, including the smaller sports field and larger car park, and describes the houses and farmland disappearing. It also notes that the playground remains in the south-east. However, “aimed to extend it” attributes an intention that the diagrams do not show, and the overview could summarise the overall shift more directly. Report visible changes and comparisons, not reasons or purposes that cannot be confirmed.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.5 Band

The answer moves from an overview to the 1950 layout and then describes 1980 and 2010 in order, so readers can follow the changes. Phrases such as “By 1980” and “In 2010” help signal the timeline. The final sentence repeats the broad overview, however, and some long sentences combine multiple changes. Use a concise overview and group details by area or by period.

Lexical Resource

5.0 Band

There is useful map vocabulary, including “north-west,” “sports field,” “science block,” and “expanded considerably.” However, “alternations” is not the right word for changes to a site, and “construction project” is unnecessarily wordy. Some wording, such as “much smaller in size,” repeats the same idea. Prefer precise terms such as “redeveloped,” “replaced,” and “covered a larger area.”

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.5 Band

The answer uses some complex clauses, but the opening contains several problems: “the different alternations that happened to” is awkward, and “the farmland has been completely altered to” uses an unsuitable tense and preposition for the past map changes. The sentence beginning “Overall” also becomes difficult to follow as several clauses are joined. Practise past-tense passive forms, such as “was replaced by,” and divide long comparisons into shorter sentences.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

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Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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