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User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 9.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

187 words AcademicTask 1Process Diagram
Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

Plan your answer

Try your own response before reading the samples.

Ideas to explore

  • Describe the process as a sequence from the farm to retail, rather than treating the products as unrelated items.
  • Mention the cold-storage stage and daily tanker delivery as important links between milking and dairy processing.
  • Distinguish the two visible product outcomes: pasteurized, packaged milk and cheese, cream and butter.

Suggested structure

  1. Introduce what the diagram depicts.
  2. Give an overview of the start, end and main phases.
  3. Describe milking, refrigerated storage and tanker delivery in sequence.
  4. Explain the outputs at the dairy and finish with transport to shops.
Useful vocabulary & examples
refrigerated storage
a cooled place where milk is kept before further processing or transport

The milk is transferred to refrigerated storage after the cows are milked.

daily tanker delivery
milk being transported by tanker once each day

A tanker collects the stored milk for daily delivery to the dairy.

pasteurized and packaged
heat-treated to make it safer, then put into containers for sale

Some of the milk is pasteurized and packaged as drinking milk.

offered for sale
made available for customers to buy

The finished dairy products are transported to shops and offered for sale.

Task Prompt

The diagram shows the process by which milk and related products are produced.
IELTS Writing Task 1 visual

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 9.0

The diagram illustrates the stages involved in the production and distribution of milk and other dairy products. Overall, the diagram provides a clear step-by-step representation of milk production, starting from cows grazing, through the milking and refrigeration stages, to the final processing and distribution of various dairy products. This industrial process ensures that milk and other dairy products are supplied to consumers through a sequence of farming, transport and factory operations. First, cows graze in fields and are milked by machine twice a day. The milk is then placed in refrigerated storage, keeping it cool before collection. A milk tanker visits the farm daily and transports the milk to a dairy for processing.

At the dairy, the milk is divided for different uses. One portion is pasteurised and packaged as drinking milk. The remainder is processed into other products, including cheese, cream and butter. Finally, the packaged milk and these dairy products are delivered to supermarkets and shops, where they are made available for sale. Thus, the process begins with milk production on farms and ends with the retail distribution of both fresh milk and its derivatives.

Targeted Improvement Tips

1
Use the overview to summarise the route from cows on the farm to packaged products in shops, rather than commenting on how clearly the diagram presents it.
2
Group the stages into farm and transport, dairy processing, and final distribution; use one or two precise sentences for each group.
3
Check that every process detail matches the visual: milking occurs twice daily, the tanker delivers milk daily, and the final destinations are supermarkets and shops.

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