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Writing Academic Task 1 Band 4.0 Example

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198 words AcademicTask 1Pie Chart

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Compare the largest category in each direction: aircraft parts are $72 million from the US to Vietnam, while coffee is $23 million from Vietnam to the US.
Highlight the gap between the leading and smaller categories: US exports include other goods at $35 million and machinery at $30.5 million, while Vietnam’s garments and other exports are both $2 million.
Point out close values where they help summarise the data: Vietnam’s seafood ($4.4 million) and rice ($4.3 million) are almost equal.

Suggested structure

Paraphrase what the charts compare and state that values are in millions of dollars.
Give an overview naming the leading category in each direction and any notable tie or overall contrast.
Describe US-to-Vietnam exports from the largest value to the smallest.
Describe Vietnam-to-US exports in descending order, grouping the close seafood and rice figures and the tied lowest figures.

Useful vocabulary & examples

account for: to make up or represent a stated amount or share
Aircraft parts account for $72 million of exports to Vietnam.
be valued at: to have a stated monetary value
Machinery is valued at $30.5 million.
be tied at: to have the same value as another category
Garments and other exports are tied at $2 million.
followed by: used to introduce the next item in a ranking
Coffee leads at $23 million, followed by fruit and vegetables at $16 million.

Task Prompt

The pie charts below shows exports between the US and Vietnam

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

The pie charts illustreates different type of exports between US and Vietnam. Overall, it is clear that, the highest propotion of exports is Aircraft parts. Vietnam exports coffe to US more rather than garments. The lowest point is others which is exported by Vietnam. The obvious trend is exports US to Vietnam, this country export much more money overall than Vietnam. Aircraft parts from the US are worth 72 million dollars, the highest figure on the charts. Other exports are 35 million, and machinery is 30.5 million. Fertiliser is 16.5 million, while cotton is 12 million and cars is only 6 million. This show that US exports to Vietnam are mainly aircraft parts and machinery. For Vietnam's exports to the US, coffee is 23 million dollars. Fruit and vegetables are next with 16 million. Seafood has 4.4 million and rice is 4.3 million, so these values are nearly the same. Garments and other exports are both 2 million. It is clear coffee and fruit and vegetables are much higher than these smaller categories. Overall, the largest export from Vietnam is coffee, while aircraft parts are the biggest item sent from the US to Vietnam.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Write a two-part overview that names aircraft parts as the largest US-to-Vietnam item and coffee as the largest Vietnam-to-US item; mention that garments and other exports are tied at $2 million.

Group the figures by direction and report each group from largest to smallest, using a clear comparison such as “Seafood and rice are close in value.”

After drafting, check every sentence for subject–verb agreement and articles, then proofread chart vocabulary such as “coffee,” “proportion” and “exports.”

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

198

Type

Pie Chart

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

4.0 Band

The answer covers both directions and gives the key figures, including “Aircraft parts from the US are worth 72 million dollars” and “coffee is 23 million dollars.” Its overview identifies the largest items, but “The lowest point is others” misses that Vietnam’s other exports and garments are tied at $2 million. Make the overview report the main contrast and the tie accurately before listing supporting figures.

Coherence & Cohesion

4.0 Band

The response moves from a brief overview to US-to-Vietnam figures and then Vietnam-to-US figures, which gives the details a usable order. However, “The obvious trend is exports US to Vietnam, this country export” runs ideas together, and the closing repeats the largest items rather than adding a clear comparison. Use separate sentences and organise each chart’s figures from largest to smallest.

Lexical Resource

4.0 Band

The answer uses relevant chart terms such as “Fruit and vegetables,” “machinery” and “the highest figure,” and includes the correct export categories. Several choices or forms reduce precision: “lowest point” is not the natural term for a chart value, and “propotion” and “coffe” are misspelled. Learn a small set of accurate comparison phrases, such as “the lowest value” and “accounted for,” and check spelling.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

3.5 Band

Some simple statements are understandable, for example “Seafood has 4.4 million and rice is 4.3 million.” However, errors recur in “The pie charts illustreates,” “This show,” and “cars is only 6 million”; the opening also has an unnecessary comma in “it is clear that, the highest.” Practise subject–verb agreement and use a final check for singular/plural nouns and sentence boundaries.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

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Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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Writing Academic Task 1 Band 4.0 Example

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