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Writing Academic Task 2 Band 4.0 Example

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269 words AcademicTask 2

Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Physical education can support students’ health and give them a way to manage the stress of academic demands.
Cookery teaches practical independence and helps students make informed choices about food.
Limited school time supports careful curriculum planning, but does not necessarily justify removing non-academic subjects altogether.

Suggested structure

Introduce the pressure to succeed academically and state clearly whether you agree with removing non-academic subjects.
Explain one benefit of physical education and connect it to students’ wellbeing or development.
Explain one practical benefit of cookery and why it matters beyond the classroom.
Acknowledge limited teaching time and propose balancing subjects instead of eliminating them.
Restate your position and briefly summarise why a broad curriculum is valuable.

Useful vocabulary & examples

a balanced curriculum: A programme of study that includes different kinds of subjects rather than focusing on only one area.
A balanced curriculum can give students time to develop academic knowledge and practical skills.
manage academic stress: Deal with pressure arising from schoolwork or academic expectations.
Physical activity may help young people manage academic stress.
practical skills: Useful abilities that can be applied to everyday tasks and responsibilities.
Cookery lessons help pupils develop practical skills they can use at home.
allocate teaching time: Decide how available classroom time is divided among subjects or activities.
Schools can allocate teaching time carefully without removing non-academic subjects.

Task Prompt

There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

Nowadays, perceiving success academically is quite hard for young people. However, few people consider that non-academic subjects should be peeled from the education system. From my perspective, I would go for the latter one. People are having a hard time pursuing their success academically. Studying various subjects as well as remembering those segments is quite difficult for many pupils. They have to learn a large amount of information in subjects like maths, science and history. If schools remove physical education and cookery, students will have more time for these important lessons. Teachers can use this time to explain hard topics, and students can prepare better for exams. This may help them get good results and have more choices in the future.

Also, some students are not good at every academic subject, so they need to spend more time practising. At present, the school day is limited, and too many subjects can make children tired. When they study fewer subjects, they may focus better and finish their homework more carefully. Therefore, removing some lessons can reduce the pressure caused by schoolwork.

On the other hand, physical education is useful because exercise is good for health, and cookery teaches children a life skill. However, families can support these activities outside school. Children can play sports after class and learn basic cooking at home. Schools should not need to teach every useful skill when there is not enough time. Academic learning should be the main purpose of school.

Because of this, I agree that non-academic subjects should be removed from the school syllabus, so children can give more attention to academic work.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Make the position explicit in the opening: state directly whether you agree that PE and cookery should be removed, rather than referring to “the latter one.”

Develop each reason with a clear link: explain how less class time for non-academic subjects could give students more time to practise or review academic content.

Replace vague or translated-sounding phrases such as “those segments” with precise topic language, and check that each verb fits its meaning and context.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

269

Type

Task 2

Criteria Breakdown

Task Response

5.0 Band

The completed answer expresses agreement with removing non-academic subjects, particularly in “I agree that non-academic subjects should be removed.” It addresses the pressure to succeed and gives reasons about study time and exams, while acknowledging the value of exercise and cookery. However, the opening phrase “few people consider” makes the issue and stance less clear, and the argument for removal is not fully developed. Clarify the position in the introduction and explain why academic time should take priority.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.0 Band

The response moves from academic workload to a counterargument and then a conclusion, with signposts such as “On the other hand” and “Because of this.” This gives readers a recognizable progression. However, the early statements repeat the idea of academic difficulty, and the relationship between “the latter one” and the view being supported is not immediately clear. State the argument once, then organize each paragraph around a distinct reason or counterpoint.

Lexical Resource

4.5 Band

The answer uses relevant topic words, including “school syllabus,” “physical education,” “cookery,” and “exams.” Some expressions are imprecise or unnatural, especially “perceiving success academically,” “peeled from the education system,” and “remembering those segments.” These choices sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Practise common collocations for achievement and curriculum, and replace vague words with specific ones such as “content” or “subjects.”

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

5.0 Band

Most sentences communicate a complete idea, and the answer attempts longer structures with “If schools remove…” and “When they study fewer subjects…”. Basic sentence control is generally understandable. The opening includes awkward constructions such as “People are having a hard time pursuing their success academically,” and several ideas rely on simple sentence patterns. Check verb forms and phrasing, then practise combining a clear claim with a reason using accurate subordinate clauses.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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Writing Academic Task 2 Band 4.0 Example

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