User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 2 Band 5.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

278 words AcademicTask 2

Task 2

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Physical education can support students’ health and give them a way to manage the stress of academic demands.
Cookery teaches practical independence and helps students make informed choices about food.
Limited school time supports careful curriculum planning, but does not necessarily justify removing non-academic subjects altogether.

Suggested structure

Introduce the pressure to succeed academically and state clearly whether you agree with removing non-academic subjects.
Explain one benefit of physical education and connect it to students’ wellbeing or development.
Explain one practical benefit of cookery and why it matters beyond the classroom.
Acknowledge limited teaching time and propose balancing subjects instead of eliminating them.
Restate your position and briefly summarise why a broad curriculum is valuable.

Useful vocabulary & examples

a balanced curriculum: A programme of study that includes different kinds of subjects rather than focusing on only one area.
A balanced curriculum can give students time to develop academic knowledge and practical skills.
manage academic stress: Deal with pressure arising from schoolwork or academic expectations.
Physical activity may help young people manage academic stress.
practical skills: Useful abilities that can be applied to everyday tasks and responsibilities.
Cookery lessons help pupils develop practical skills they can use at home.
allocate teaching time: Decide how available classroom time is divided among subjects or activities.
Schools can allocate teaching time carefully without removing non-academic subjects.

Task Prompt

There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 5.0

It is true that adolesents and young people are really struggling to become successful in academics today, because of the pressure that they have during the study. Some people think that non-essentinal subjects such as physical education and cookery, should be deleted from the school program, and it can make children to be more focused on academic subjects. However, I disagree with removing these lessons. Academic achievement is important, but a balanced education should help children develop different abilities as well as prepare for exams.

Firstly, physical education supports students’ health and can teach them how to work with others. Children who spend the whole school day sitting in classrooms may benefit from regular exercise. Team games can also develop cooperation and discipline, which are useful beyond school. Removing PE could therefore make school less balanced without guaranteeing better academic results.

Cookery is also a practical subject. Students can learn to prepare simple meals and understand basic nutrition, skills that are useful in everyday life. In addition, practical lessons may interest pupils who do not always enjoy traditional academic subjects. This can help them stay engaged with learning more generally.

Admittedly, schools have limited time, and students facing heavy workloads may need more time for core subjects such as mathematics and science. However, this does not mean that non-academic lessons must be removed entirely. Schools could plan the timetable carefully and ensure that academic subjects receive sufficient attention while retaining a range of useful activities.

In conclusion, although academic pressure is a genuine concern, I disagree that physical education and cookery should be taken out of the syllabus. Both contribute to students’ health, practical skills and broader development.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Replace the misspellings in the opening, then read it aloud while checking whether each phrase sounds natural in English.

Add one developed explanation to each main reason: connect PE to a specific benefit and cookery to a practical everyday outcome.

After drafting, check verb patterns such as “help someone do something” and remove commas that separate a subject from its verb.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

5.0

Modest

Words

278

Type

Task 2

Criteria Breakdown

Task Response

5.5 Band

The completed response takes a clear position in “I disagree with removing these lessons” and gives relevant reasons for retaining PE and cookery, including health, cooperation and practical skills. It also acknowledges limited school time. The opening’s claim that young people are struggling academically is not developed with evidence, and the opposing view could be explained more fully. Next, clarify why removing these subjects would not reliably improve achievement.

Coherence & Cohesion

6.0 Band

The response develops a recognisable sequence: position, a paragraph on PE, a paragraph on cookery, a concession and a conclusion. “Firstly,” “In addition” and “Admittedly” help signal those moves. The opening sentence is crowded, and the two examples could be linked more explicitly to the central idea of a balanced education. Next, give each body paragraph a concise topic sentence that directly supports your disagreement.

Lexical Resource

5.5 Band

There is relevant topic vocabulary, including “academic achievement,” “basic nutrition” and “practical skills,” and the response generally communicates its ideas clearly. However, the exact opening uses the misspellings “adolesents” and “non-essentinal,” while “successful in academics” is an awkward phrase. Next, proofread spelling and build collocations such as “succeed academically,” “academic pressure” and “school syllabus” into a short topic vocabulary list.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

5.0 Band

The later paragraphs use a mix of simple and complex structures, such as “Although academic pressure is a genuine concern…” and “which are useful beyond school.” The preserved opening contains several errors: the comma in “cookery, should” is unnecessary, and “make children to be more focused” uses an incorrect verb pattern. Next, practise verb patterns like “help children focus” and check sentence punctuation during proofreading.

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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