User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 6.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

206 words AcademicTask 1Process Diagram

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

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Ideas to explore

Describe the overall shift from scientific research to tourism before listing individual map features.
Compare what stayed the same (the pier, beach, natural spring and rocks) with what was added or replaced.
Group details by location: the western pier and beach, the central hotel and leisure facilities, and the eastern spring, rocks and lookout.

Suggested structure

Introduce what the two maps compare.
Give an overview of the island’s main change and any notable features that remain.
Describe the past layout, moving from west to east.
Describe the present layout in the same order and compare new facilities with former features.

Useful vocabulary & examples

be transformed into: to change substantially into a different kind of place or thing
Paradise Island has been transformed into a popular tourist destination.
remain in place: to continue to exist in the same location
The natural spring and the rocks remain in place on the eastern side.
be replaced by: to give way to something new in the same position or role
The small boat was replaced by a cruise ship.
inland from: away from the coast and towards the interior
The hotel complex is located inland from the beach.

Task Prompt

The diagram below show the condition of paradise island in the past and now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 6.0

The maps depict the transformation of Paradise Island from past to present. Overall, it is apparent that the island has undergone substantial shifts, cutting out some natutal beauty and providing more spaces for recreational purposes. The island used to have a small pier situated in the westernmost side, which could only accommodate small boats. This pier has been extended, and a cruise ship can now dock beside it. Several facilities have also been added, including a hotel complex, a swimming pool, an open restaurant, a café and a BBQ area. A cycle path now runs around much of the island, connecting the new attractions, while a scenic lookout has been added in the northeast. In the past, the island was largely undeveloped, with a scientific research station and groups of palm trees around its centre. These features are no longer shown on the present map. The beach in the northwest remains, and swimming is now permitted there. The natural spring and rocks in the eastern part of the island also remain, although the surrounding area has gained visitor facilities. Overall, the island has changed from a quiet natural location with limited access into a developed destination for tourists, while retaining some of its original natural features.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Make the overview more specific by identifying both the main development and the features that disappeared, rather than saying only that natural beauty was reduced.

Group the details by comparison: describe the former facilities and landscape, then the new facilities, and finish with features that remain.

Proofread the opening for spelling and place prepositions; check words such as “natural” and phrases such as “on the western side.”

AI Feedback

Overall Band

6.0

Competent

Words

206

Type

Process Diagram

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

6.0 Band

The overview identifies the main shift in “from past to present” and the completed response compares the former research station and palm trees with the new visitor facilities. It also notes natural features that remain, including the spring and rocks. The phrase “cutting out some natutal beauty” is a broad interpretation; make the overview more precise by naming the lost trees and research station, and distinguishing them from features that remain.

Coherence & Cohesion

6.0 Band

The answer moves from an overview to the former pier, then to new developments and remaining features, so the reader can follow the comparison. “Several facilities have also been added” effectively introduces a group of changes. However, the opening overview and later detail are not fully aligned: it suggests broad loss of natural beauty before clarifying what remains. Organise the response explicitly around past features, new facilities and retained features.

Lexical Resource

5.5 Band

There is useful map vocabulary in “westernmost side,” “accommodate small boats,” “scenic lookout” and “natural spring.” The phrase “providing more spaces for recreational purposes” is understandable but vague, and “cutting out some natutal beauty” is an imprecise description of the removal of particular features. Use concrete labels such as “visitor facilities” and “palm trees,” and check the spelling of “natural.”

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

5.5 Band

The completed response uses a range of simple and compound sentence forms, including the relative clause “which could only accommodate small boats.” There are also errors in the preserved opening: “situated in the westernmost side” is not the natural preposition pattern, and “natutal” is misspelled. Review prepositions with place descriptions, and proofread the preserved text before submitting; for example, use “on the western side.”

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

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