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User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 9.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

212 words AcademicTask 1Bar Chart
Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

Plan your answer

Try your own response before reading the samples.

Ideas to explore

  • Compare each country group with the parity benchmark of 100, noting that developed countries reached or exceeded it only in tertiary education.
  • Identify the largest increase: developing countries’ secondary ratio rose by 10 points, from 72 to 82.
  • Highlight the widest gap: tertiary education in 1998 had figures of 75 in developing countries and 112 in developed countries.

Suggested structure

  1. Paraphrase what the chart measures and state the years and education levels.
  2. Give an overview of the overall group difference and identify the most notable level.
  3. Describe the three developing-country ratios, including their changes over time and position relative to 100.
  4. Compare the developed-country figures and finish with the largest gap.
Useful vocabulary & examples
gender parity
Equal representation of females and males, shown here by a ratio of 100 girls per 100 boys.

The developed-country primary ratio was close to gender parity in both years.

edge up
Increase by a small amount.

The developed-country primary ratio edged up from 95 to 96.

remain below the target
Stay under a stated benchmark or goal.

All three developing-country ratios remained below the target of 100 in 1998.

the gap between the groups
The difference between the figures for two categories.

The gap between the groups was largest in tertiary education in 1998.

Task Prompt

The chart below shows the number of girls per 100 boys enrolled in different levels of school education.
IELTS Writing Task 1 visual

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 9.0

The bar chart compares the number of girls per 100 boys enrolled in primary, secondary, and tertiary education in both developing and developed countries in 1990 and 1998. A benchmark of gender equality is indicated by the target line at 100. Overall, developed countries consistently had more balanced, and even female-dominant, enrollment across all education levels, with the female advantage occurring only in tertiary education. In developing countries, by contrast, girls' representation fell short of parity at every stage. The figures generally increased between 1990 and 1998, although the size of the change varied by level and country group.

In developing countries, the ratio in primary education rose from 83 to 87 girls per 100 boys. The secondary figure increased more sharply, from 72 to 82, while tertiary enrolment climbed from 66 to 75. Thus, the gap was widest in tertiary education in both years.

The developed-country figures were much closer to equality in primary and secondary schooling. Primary ratios edged up from 95 to 96, and secondary ratios from 98 to 99. At tertiary level, however, girls outnumbered boys: the ratio rose from 105 in 1990 to 112 in 1998, the highest value shown. Overall, progress occurred in both groups, but parity was reached or exceeded only in developed-country tertiary education.

Targeted Improvement Tips

1
Make the overview’s scope explicit: state that developed-country ratios were closer to parity at all levels, but exceeded parity only in tertiary education.
2
Group the developing-country figures together and compare the size of their gaps: the ratios decline from primary to tertiary education in both years.
3
Use one concise synthesis at the end rather than repeating the overview; emphasize that the largest reported ratio is 112 in developed-country tertiary education in 1998.

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