User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 9.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

179 words AcademicTask 1Multiple Graphs

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

Plan your answer

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Ideas to explore

Further study was the leading destination for both graduates and postgraduates.
Voluntary work was the least common option in each group.
Graduate counts exceeded postgraduate counts in all four categories, with the biggest absolute difference in further study.

Suggested structure

Paraphrase the chart topic and specify the year and population.
Give an overview of the shared highest and lowest categories.
Report graduate figures in rank order, grouping the leading choices and the smaller categories.
Report postgraduate figures in the same order to make comparisons easy.
Close with the most notable difference between the two groups.

Useful vocabulary & examples

the most common destination: The option chosen by the largest number of people.
Further study was the most common destination for both groups.
ranked second: Was the second-highest category in a set of figures.
Part-time work ranked second for graduates.
by contrast: A linking phrase used to introduce a noticeably different figure or fact.
By contrast, only 3,500 graduates undertook voluntary work.
the largest difference: The greatest gap between two compared figures.
The largest difference between the groups was in further study.

Task Prompt

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 9.0

The charts illustrate the various destinations of UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not enter full-time employment after graduating in 2008. For graduates, the majority pursued further education, with 29,665 individuals choosing this path. Part-time work was the second most common option, with 17,735 graduates opting for this. A notable number of graduates, around 16,235, were unemployed. In comparison, only 3,500 graduates undertook voluntary work, making it the least popular destination.

A similar pattern is evident among postgraduates. Further study was again the most common choice, at 2,725, narrowly ahead of part-time employment, which accounted for 2,535 people. Unemployment affected 1,625 postgraduates, while voluntary work was by far the least frequent outcome, at 345.

Overall, further study was the leading destination for both groups, whereas voluntary work attracted the fewest students. Graduate totals were higher in all four categories, and the largest absolute gap was in further study: 29,665 graduates compared with 2,725 postgraduates. Part-time work ranked second for both groups, while unemployment was the third most common outcome.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Replace “majority” with “largest group” when a category is the highest but accounts for less than half of the total.

Check each figure against the relevant chart and avoid approximation words such as “around” when an exact count is shown.

Use the overview to highlight the leading and least common destinations, then identify the largest difference between graduates and postgraduates without repeating every ranking.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

9.0

Excellent

Words

179

Type

Multiple Graphs

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

8.0 Band

The answer reports the main destinations for both groups and includes all eight figures, for example, “2,725” in further study and “345” in voluntary work. However, “the majority pursued further education” overstates the chart: further study is the largest category, but it does not exceed half of graduate outcomes. Use “the largest group” and keep the overview focused on rankings and the graduate–postgraduate comparison.

Coherence & Cohesion

8.5 Band

The response moves clearly from graduate figures to postgraduate figures, then gives an overview, and phrases such as “A similar pattern is evident among postgraduates” help signal the shift. The overview’s final sentence repeats rankings already described in the body, so it could be more efficient. Use that space to state the strongest cross-group comparison, such as the particularly large difference in further-study totals.

Lexical Resource

8.0 Band

The answer uses relevant chart language, including “least popular destination,” “narrowly ahead,” and “leading destination,” and distinguishes employment from voluntary work. “Around 16,235” is less precise than necessary because the chart gives an exact figure, and “further education” and “further study” vary the label slightly. Prefer the chart’s category wording consistently and present exact figures without “around.”

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

8.5 Band

Sentence structures are varied and controlled, including the subordinate clause in “while voluntary work was by far the least frequent outcome.” The figures are generally integrated smoothly into the sentences, with no distracting grammatical problems. One optional refinement is to reduce the repeated “with” construction in “with 17,735 graduates opting for this”; try a concise reporting clause such as “a total of 17,735 chose this option.”

Topic Band Distribution

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