User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 4.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

175 words AcademicTask 1Process Diagram

Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

Plan your answer

Try your own response before reading the samples.

Ideas to explore

The process has two parallel preparation routes: one for potatoes and one for fresh salmon.
The diagram gives different time limits for the ingredients: potatoes may be held for up to one month, while salmon is processed within 12 hours or less.
After preparation, the ingredients meet at assembly; the pies are wrapped, frozen, stored and dispatched.

Suggested structure

Paraphrase the process title and give an overview of the separate ingredient routes and their convergence.
Describe the potato preparation sequence in diagram order, including its stated storage period.
Describe the salmon route, including the seasoning, cooking, removal of skin and bones, and inspection.
Explain assembly and finish with wrapping, freezing, storage and dispatch.

Useful vocabulary & examples

be kept for up to one month: to remain in storage for no longer than a month
The potatoes may be kept for up to one month before they are cleaned.
be stripped of its skin and bones: to have the outer skin and bones removed
After cooking, the salmon is stripped of its skin and bones.
converge at assembly: to come together at the stage where components are combined
The potato and salmon preparation routes converge at assembly.
be dispatched: to be sent out from a place to its destination
The frozen pies are stored before they are dispatched.

Task Prompt

The diagram give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies.

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 4.0

The diagram illustrates the process of manufacturing frozen fish pies. Overall, there are multiple processes involved to make a frozen fish pie while there are four main ingredients to make fish pie: fish, peas, sauce and potato to make a fish pie. The fish pie production line starts with sliced potato, where it take up to one month for the potatoes to arrive. They are cleaned, peeled and sliced, then boiled and chilled. Meanwhile, fresh salmon is delivered within 12 hours or less. Lemon juice and salt are added before it is cooked in a steam oven. After cooking, workers remove the skin and bones, and the fish is inspected. Next, the fish is placed in pie containers, with prepared peas and prepared sauce added. The sliced potatoes are placed on top, and each pie is wrapped. The wrapped pies are then frozen and sent to storage or dispatch. The process end when frozen pies are ready to deliver. The two lines join when the fish mixture and sliced potato are assembled in each pie.

Targeted Improvement Tips

Write an overview that identifies the potato and salmon preparation lines and explains that they join during pie assembly.

Check every verb against its subject, especially singular subjects such as “the process,” and review missing articles such as “a fish pie.”

Use a quick diagram checklist before finishing: potato delivery and preparation, salmon delivery and preparation, assembly, wrapping, freezing, and storage or dispatch.

AI Feedback

Overall Band

4.0

Modest

Words

175

Type

Process Diagram

Criteria Breakdown

Task Achievement

5.0 Band

You cover the main sequence, including potato preparation, salmon processing, assembly, wrapping and freezing. The comparison between deliveries—“up to one month” and “within 12 hours or less”—is useful, although the overview mainly repeats the ingredients and does not clearly summarise the two production lines. Some final details are imprecise. Next, make the overview identify the two lines and state where they join.

Coherence & Cohesion

4.5 Band

The answer generally follows the diagram’s order, using markers such as “Meanwhile,” “After cooking” and “Next.” These help distinguish the salmon route from the potato route, and the final sentence notes that they join. However, the opening repeats “to make a fish pie,” while the sequence of assembly is not fully clear. Use one stage per sentence and group the two preparation lines before describing their meeting point.

Lexical Resource

4.5 Band

Relevant process vocabulary includes “peeled,” “boiled,” “inspected” and “wrapped,” so the reader can follow several diagram stages. The repeated phrase “prepared peas and prepared sauce” and the general wording “multiple processes” limit precision. A useful next step is to use concise process terms such as “seasoned,” “assembled” and “packaged,” while keeping each word faithful to the labels and actions shown.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4.0 Band

The answer attempts passive forms, for example “are added” and “is inspected,” which suit a process description. There are also noticeable errors in “where it take up” and “The process end,” and the repeated opening clause is difficult to control. Practise subject–verb agreement and consistent passive structures; for instance, make the process the subject of a clear sentence such as “The pies are then frozen.”

Topic Band Distribution

Band 9.03 examples

Band 8.03 examples

Band 7.03 examples

Band 6.03 examples

Band 5.03 examples

Band 4.03 examples

Practice this prompt

Use the same topic in Hack Admission AI and compare your answer with this example.

Check your answer on this topic Browse all examples