Back to Writing Hub

User-written IELTS example

Writing Academic Task 1 Band 6.0 Example

Original task prompt, user essay, band score, and related examples in the same report workspace.

182 words AcademicTask 1Process Diagram
Task 1

Illustrative target band for this original model answer.

Plan your answer

Try your own response before reading the samples.

Ideas to explore

  • The process has two parallel preparation routes: one for potatoes and one for fresh salmon.
  • The diagram gives different time limits for the ingredients: potatoes may be held for up to one month, while salmon is processed within 12 hours or less.
  • After preparation, the ingredients meet at assembly; the pies are wrapped, frozen, stored and dispatched.

Suggested structure

  1. Paraphrase the process title and give an overview of the separate ingredient routes and their convergence.
  2. Describe the potato preparation sequence in diagram order, including its stated storage period.
  3. Describe the salmon route, including the seasoning, cooking, removal of skin and bones, and inspection.
  4. Explain assembly and finish with wrapping, freezing, storage and dispatch.
Useful vocabulary & examples
be kept for up to one month
to remain in storage for no longer than a month

The potatoes may be kept for up to one month before they are cleaned.

be stripped of its skin and bones
to have the outer skin and bones removed

After cooking, the salmon is stripped of its skin and bones.

converge at assembly
to come together at the stage where components are combined

The potato and salmon preparation routes converge at assembly.

be dispatched
to be sent out from a place to its destination

The frozen pies are stored before they are dispatched.

Task Prompt

The diagram give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies.
IELTS Writing Task 1 visual

User Essay Analysis

Review the public answer with report-style highlights.

Band 6.0

The diagrams demonstrates information about how frozen fish pies are manufactured. Overall, the process involved four stages: prepares all ingredients, cooks and seasons the food, freezes and stores and finally ends up with delivery. In the beginning stage, all basic ingredients included potatoes, prepared peas, prepared sauce, and fresh salmon from a delivery that takes 12 hours or less. Potatoes, in contrast, may be delivered up to one month before production begins. They are cleaned, peeled and sliced on a conveyor belt, then boiled and chilled before being stored.

Meanwhile, the salmon is seasoned with lemon juice and salt and cooked in a steam oven. After cooking, its skin and bones are removed, and the fish is inspected. Prepared peas and sauce are then added to the other ingredients as the pies are assembled. The filled pies are wrapped and carried along the conveyor to the freezing unit. Finally, the frozen products are stored and dispatched for delivery. The delivery times show that the fish arrives within 12 hours or less, whereas potatoes may be delivered up to one month in advance.

Targeted Improvement Tips

1
Rewrite the overview as a concise summary of the two preparation lines and their later assembly; avoid using incomplete verb phrases after a colon.
2
Describe the potato and salmon lines separately, then explain how the prepared ingredients move into pie assembly, wrapping, freezing and dispatch.
3
Check subject–verb agreement and remove the repeated delivery-time information from the final sentence.

Related examples for this topic

Compare different bands on the same IELTS prompt.

Browse all